145 - Hurt People Hurt
In today's world, where social media plays a huge role in how we communicate, you may often encounter hurtful comments directed at you or others. These comments can be particularly painful when they attack aspects of your identity, such as your disability.
I recently got a taste of negative, hurtful comments when I ran an advertising campaign for some free resources my company, Radiant Abilities, offers on dating and relationships, particularly if you live with a disability. We ran an ad featuring a smiling, attractive woman with Down syndrome, offering our free dating profile guide.
The comments we got. Whoa. I was blown away by how people took the time to make mean, hurtful comments. I don’t like to give unkindness like that attention so I won’t go into what they were but I will highlight the meanest one which implied there is reason for eugenics.
My reaction to every single hurtful comment was, Boy, this person must be really unhappy with themselves to go to extent to spray pain into the world because of a difference in someone else.
When someone makes a hurtful comment, especially online, it can feel deeply personal. You might find yourself questioning your worth or feeling isolated. However, it's crucial to understand that these comments are frequently a reflection of the pain and insecurity of the person behind the screen. People who lash out often do so because they are grappling with their own issues and projecting their hurt onto others. This doesn't excuse their behavior, but it helps you see that their words are not a measure of your value.
The concept of "hurt people hurt people" is a powerful one. It means that those who inflict pain on others are often dealing with unresolved pain themselves. When someone attacks you, it's likely because they are struggling with their own sense of self-worth and acceptance. By understanding this, you can begin to detach from the negativity directed at you and see it for what it truly is: a reflection of their inner turmoil, not a true assessment of who you are.
At the core of much hurtful behavior is a lack of self-acceptance. When individuals are not at peace with themselves, they may lash out in an attempt to manage their own discomfort. This lack of self-acceptance can stem from many sources, including societal pressures, personal insecurities, or past traumas. Recognizing this can help you feel more compassionate towards those who hurt others, and more importantly, it can help you protect your own mental and emotional well-being.
When you embrace Disability Pride, you are making a powerful statement that you accept and celebrate yourself exactly as you are. This self-acceptance is a crucial step in shielding yourself from the negativity of others. By recognizing your worth and standing firm in your identity, you become more resilient to the harmful comments that may come your way. You know that your value is not diminished by the ignorance or pain of others.
It's important to recognize that Disability Pride is about embracing your identity with confidence and celebrating the unique experiences and strengths that come with it. When you encounter negativity, remember that these hurtful remarks often say more about the person making them than they do about you.
It's also helpful to remember that social media, while a powerful tool for connection, can also amplify negativity. People feel emboldened to say things online that they might never say in person. This environment can create a false sense of reality where the loudest, most negative voices seem to dominate. By stepping back and gaining perspective, you can remind yourself that these comments are not a true reflection of the world or your place in it.
Building a supportive community is another vital step in maintaining your mental and emotional health. Surround yourself with people who understand and respect your experiences, and who will lift you up rather than tear you down. This community can provide a buffer against the negativity you might encounter and remind you of your inherent worth and dignity. Together, you can celebrate your achievements and support each other through challenges.
Ultimately, your journey towards self-acceptance and Disability Pride is a deeply personal one. While hurtful comments can sting, they do not define you. By recognizing that such negativity often stems from the pain and insecurity of others, you can maintain your sense of self-worth and continue to advocate for acceptance and pride in your identity. You are deserving of respect, and no comment, no matter how hurtful, can take that away from you.
Join Dating Made Easier to be part of a supportive community that will embrace who you are and foster your pride on your dating journey to success and happiness.
Resources
How to Write a Kick Butt Dating Profile
Check out our Dating Memberships:
Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more.
Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more.
Music by Successful Motivation
Artwork photo by Elevate
